Depression From Being in a Sexless Relationship

Depression From Being in a Sexless Relationship

Regardless of the cause, it is important for couples to address the issue of a sexless marriage in order to prevent it from causing further problems. One way to do this is by talking openly and honestly about the issue.
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By: Mark Goldberg, LCMFT, CST

A sexless marriage is a marital relationship in which little or no sexual activity occurs between the two spouses. This lack of physical intimacy can lead to feelings of loneliness, resentment, and frustration for one or both partners. It can also have a negative impact on the overall health of the marriage. (In this article, we will explore the causes of a sexless marriage and discuss ways to address this issue in order to improve the relationship.)

A sexless marriage can be a difficult and emotionally trying experience for both partners. While it is not uncommon for couples to go through periods of low sexual desire, a sexless marriage, defined as one in which there is little or no sexual activity for an extended period of time, can be a major source of stress and lead to depression for one or both partners.

Lack of physical intimacy can lead to feelings of isolation and disconnection, as well as a lack of emotional fulfillment. It can also lead to feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and resentment. For many people, sexual activity is an important part of a romantic relationship and its absence can lead to a sense of loneliness and disconnection from one’s partner.

Causes of a Sexless Marriage

A man on a journey; curing ED is a journey.There are many possible reasons why a marriage may become sexless. One common cause is a lack of emotional connection between the spouses. When partners feel distant or disconnected from each other, they may lose interest in physical intimacy. Stress, work, and the demands of daily life can also contribute to a decline in sexual activity.

Physical health issues, such as low libido or chronic pain, can also play a role. In some cases, one partner may have a higher sex drive than the other, which can lead to feelings of rejection and frustration. Past traumas or negative experiences may also affect a person’s ability to enjoy sex.

It is important to remember that a sexless marriage is not uncommon, and it is not necessarily a sign that the relationship is in trouble. However, if the lack of physical intimacy is causing distress for one or both partners, it is important to address the issue.

How Sexless Relationships cause Depression

Relationships can be a source of great joy and fulfillment, but they can also be a cause of significant stress and unhappiness. In fact, research has shown that being in a distressed or unhealthy relationship can contribute to the development of depression. This is because relationships can have a powerful impact on our emotions, behaviors, and overall well-being.

One way in which a relationship can cause depression is through the experience of neglect. When we feel neglected or unsupported by our partner, it can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation. This is especially true if the neglect is ongoing or if we have a deep need for connection and support. When we do not feel seen or heard by our partner, it can cause us to doubt our own value and worth, which can contribute to the development of depression. A lack of sexual contact can lead to feeling neglected.

Another factor that can contribute to the development of depression in a relationship is the experience of major life transitions. Relationships can be a source of stability and support during times of change, but they can also be a source of stress. For example, getting married, having a child, or moving in together can all be major life transitions that can impact a relationship. If these transitions are not managed well, they can cause strain on the relationship and lead to feelings of sadness and distance both physically and emotionally.

Finally, a relationship can cause depression if it is characterized by a lack of communication and connection. When we are not able to effectively communicate with our partner, it can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a feeling of disconnection. This can be especially difficult if we have different needs and values when it comes to communication. When we are not able to connect with our partner on a deep level, it can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation, which can contribute to the development of depression.

Addressing a Sexless Relationship

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Regardless of the cause, it is important for couples to address the issue of a sexless marriage in order to prevent it from causing further problems. One way to do this is by talking openly and honestly about the issue. It may be helpful for both partners to share their feelings and concerns and to try to understand each other’s perspectives. It may also be helpful to seek the support of a therapist or counselor who can help the couple address any underlying issues and find ways to improve their relationship.

There are also practical steps that couples can take to improve their physical intimacy. For example, they can try setting aside specific times for intimacy, setting the mood with romantic gestures or setting, and trying new sexual activities or positions. It may also be helpful to prioritize physical affection in the form of non-sexual touch, such as holding hands, cuddling, or kissing.

If one partner is experiencing a low libido due to medical issues or medications, it may be possible to address these underlying causes in order to improve sexual desire. It may also be helpful for the couple to explore alternative ways of expressing affection and intimacy, such as through non-sexual physical touch or through other forms of intimacy, such as emotional connection or shared activities.

It is also important for couples to remember that it is normal for sexual desire and activity to vary over time and that it is natural for couples to go through phases of low sexual desire. With open and honest communication, effort to address any underlying issues, and a willingness to try new things, it is possible for couples to improve their physical intimacy and strengthen their relationship.

So what can you do if you feel like lack of sex in your relationship is causing depression?

Seek support: It can be helpful to talk to a therapist or a trusted friend or family member about your feelings. They can provide a safe and supportive space for you to process your emotions and help you to identify healthy ways to cope with any challenges you may be facing in your relationship.

  • Communicate openly: If you are feeling neglected or unsupported by your partner, it is important to communicate your needs and feelings. This can be difficult, but it is important to be honest and direct in order to facilitate understanding and connection.
  • Seek help for depression: If you are experiencing symptoms of depression, it is important to seek help from a mental health professional. They can help you to identify the causes of your depression and provide you with the tools and support you need to manage your symptoms and improve your overall well-being.
  • Take care of yourself: It is important to prioritize your own physical and emotional well-being, even if you are in a relationship. This may involve setting boundaries, taking time for self-care, and engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

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Erection IQ founder Mark Goldberg helps men and their loved ones resolve issues in the bedroom and relationship problems. He is a certified sex therapist and offers individual, one-on-one services to men throughout the world through a secure, telehealth platform. It’s 100% confidential. You can visit the Center for Intimacy, Connection and Change website to schedule a free consult with Mark.

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Article Updated – March 2023